


it's the little things you do

by towardstheair



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), American Idol RPF, Kris Allen (Musician)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-30
Updated: 2010-09-30
Packaged: 2017-10-21 08:41:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/223225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/towardstheair/pseuds/towardstheair
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>Kris gets drunk.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	it's the little things you do

**it's the little things you do**

  
Kris remembers when he was 15 he got drunk on cheap beer at a family party. He snuck underneath a table with his cousin and they drank two bottles each. Kris remembers laughing a lot that night, but he also remembers how sick he was the next day and the lecture he got from his Mama. It wasn't a defining moment, he didn't promise himself to never drink again. Purely because he was 15 and well, the next time he knew he'd put more planning into it. When he was 17, he and Daniel stole a bottle of Whiskey out of their Dad's cabinet and went outside to the bottom of the garden and spent the whole night talking and drinking. There was nothing particularly special about that night, but Kris felt the shift. He could feel that things were changing. He'd be leaving for college, leaving a part of his life behind. He always remembers that night happily, warm and safe, slightly numbed from the alcohol.

For most people he imagines college is spent in a drunken haze but for Kris it was different. He was happy and comfortable with the friends he'd made and everything was well... kind of planned out for him. College, Katy, marriage, job – that was that. Things never really work out the way you plan though. American Idol really was not part of the plan, it was more a dream, an ideal so when it became reality Kris wasn't entirely sure what to do with that. It wasn't just the experience and winning either, it led to all these other things, all these other possibilities and brought people into his life he never would have known. The most important one being Adam Lambert.

  
–

  
They've come a long way from meeting until well... now. Kris never would have expected this would be his life. Touring, divorced, making music and being completely head over heels in love with a man. It is a strange and crazy world. So far off from his original plans.

It's the first show Kris has been to. He isn't surprised by anything that Adam does or says. It's all so completely Adam and it just makes Kris love him even more, something he didn't think was possible. He hears the screams building up before it even happens and then Adam and Tommy are all over one another and yeah... Kris is deaf. He wishes he was blind right about now too. He likes Tommy, in fact Tommy is _funny_. Hilariously so. He always knows that the reason the two of them do this is for the reaction they get from the crowd. Kris has no reason or right to be jealous. Adam isn't his boyfriend, he has no idea how Kris feels and it's all down to Kris because he’s such a chicken and won't just tell Adam already.

Adam is happy and chatty as he works the room and Kris has to hide in the side lines. Which is fine, he knows that he and Adam can't be seen around each other too much, which even though he knows, he doesn't really understand. He doesn't spend too much time over thinking the small things and that really is one of them. It's all about keeping up appearances apparently. Being seen with Adam a lot just after his divorce is not a good thing. Which again is ridiculous, because Adam has been amazing through the whole thing, the perfect friend – how is that a bad thing? He doesn't explain that to them of course, he just nods his head and does as he’s told. Mostly because he knows the truth, and really that's enough for him.

  
–

  
Adam has booked out a part of the club, he knows the owner and it's safe for Kris to walk around and be seen because there are no fans or people with cameras around. There are however a group of far too pretty boys talking with Adam. Adam is full on flirt mode and the jealously creeps up on Kris again. It's not like he can really control it – it seems to spark up any time someone so much as breathes in Adam's direction. It's pathetic because he really has never been a jealous person at all. It's just Adam. It's probably because well... look at Adam. There is a beauty to him that goes deeper than what's on the surface, something in his eyes sparkling beneath the surface, it's hard not to be gravitated towards him, to want to be in his presence. He has this way when you talk to him of making you feel like the only person in the room. Kris knows the feeling all too well, he can see it in the faces of the pretty boys Adam is talking to. Jealousy.

He orders a drink from the bar and then another four, it seems like a good idea and he needs a numbing feeling right now. If he drinks more he will care less. It's not just about being jealous, although that is playing a pretty big part right now. It's just... he's been trying not to be too hard on himself, being divorced... it's okay. He isn't pining over Katy every night because it really is what they both wanted. They are friends and that's not something that a lot of people who get divorced can say. It's hard not to feel like he really let himself down though, he made promises and they are broken, no matter how amicable the separation was.

He ends up with another drink in front of him and a warm hand on his back, his stomach has butterflies fluttering around in the hopes that it's Adam he'll see when he turns. It's not. It's one of the pretty boys Adam had been talking to. He is all blonde hair and green eyes. He introduces himself as Mark... Kris thinks anyway. Kris can feel himself getting kind of fuzzy and he knows that he has a permanent smile plastered on his face. He can sense Mark sitting very closely to him, it almost feels like he has crawled onto the stool Kris is sitting on. It's kind of nice, Kris feels warm and floaty and Mark's fingers trailing up his arm is... _nice_. There's warmth breath on his neck, then lips pressing against his skin and Kris mumbles something that doesn't even make sense to himself. He knows there is something very wrong with this whole scenario but he can't seem to stop himself. It's been a while. He hasn't felt the touch of someone else on his body in a long time and it feels good to be wanted. It makes him feel lighter somehow. He leans into the lips because they are hot and searching. Mark's hand is resting on his stomach, it feels warm through his shirt and when he moves his hand in circles it makes Kris feel warm all over.

There are more words in his ear, something about going somewhere more private. He laughs at that, because Kris has never had those words spoke to him ever. He is surprising himself tonight. He lets himself be lead by the hand, his mind fuzzy but still thinking: _Adam, Adam. Where is Adam?_ Over and over again.

Kris's back hits the wall and then Mark is all over him. It feels nice to begin with, hands on skin and lips on his neck. There's some distance though. Kris feels like he is out of his body watching the whole thing play out and it just seems _wrong_ somehow. The guy is fine, pretty and eager. He is slinking down onto his knees, touching Kris through his jeans and he is sure he blacks out for a moment because it feels _good_. Good but not right. He clumsily holds the guys hand to make him stop. No.

Kris is not making good decisions right now. He shouldn't be out here, even if the guy is getting pretty persistent and even if it does feel good. He needs to ignore that part and remember how much he will regret this as soon as it's over.

 _“Kris?”_

Adam. Kris smiles and turns his head. Adam looks beautiful even with his angry, hard expression. Why is Adam angry?

“Hey, Adam.”

“Who the fuck are you?”

“I'm Kris.”

Then Kris realises it was not him Adam was talking to and the Mark guy is standing up. Adam seems really mad now. He is actually stalking towards the Mark guy and Kris giggles because he has never really seen Adam angry before. It's kind of hot. _Damn him._

He can vaguely hear Adam yelling something and he can't stop laughing because it really is un-Adam like behaviour. He has no idea where he is though and it's kind of dark. He also feels pretty sleepy. The wall is comfy so he leans back even more and just slides down.

“Kris?” Adam is back. He sounds worried. Kris reaches out for him, he doesn't want Adam to be worried, he wants to protect Adam and love him. Why won't Adam let Kris love him?

“Why?” Kris mumbles.

“Why what? Kris did you take something?”

Take something? No. Why would he take anything? Kris wants to push at Adam and tell him that he took something. He took Kris's heart and he wants it back right now. But that's sort of lame.

“No. I'm lame.”

“No, you're not. You're drunk.”

“Am not. You are.”

Then Adam laughs and everything seems perfect again. “Yay.” Kris giggles and leans forward onto Adam. His head falls onto Adam's neck. Adam smells good. “You smell good.”

Did he say that out loud? Oh well. Adam moves him then which he really is not okay with because he was very happy being so close to Adam. He can hear Adam talking to someone and then he is lifted sort of the ground. It's kind of awesome. He feels safe and warm. Then the lights go out.

  
–

  
It's bright and painful when he opens his eyes. But the sheets are cool against his skin. He can smell coffee and he is craving it now, or maybe something stronger like a painkiller or four. He rubs his eyes and groans. Kris tries to remember how he ended up here and where exactly here is. He thinks he is in a hotel room, just not _his_ hotel room.

“Good morning.”

He follows the voice and finds Adam sitting by the window reading. “How are you feeling?”

Kris groans and stares longingly at the coffee. “Like I would love some coffee right now.”

Adam nods and prepares Kris's coffee. Kris keeps expecting Adam to ask how he takes it but he makes it just right, knows exactly what Kris likes. Kris sits up and leans against the head board. When he looks down at himself and lifts up the sheet he only has his boxers on.

“Did you... undress me?” If he did Kris is going to kick himself for not being awake for that.

“Oh no.” Adam holds up his hands. “You did that all yourself. The entire ride back to the hotel you kept promising me a strip tease and you sure delivered. Of course up until you tried to take off your jeans and fell over. It was pretty cute.”

Kris face plants into his hands because that is extremely mortifying news. “What else did I do?”

“Not much, sang me a beautiful rendition of Poker Face, told me I was beautiful like 20 times oh and you know, totally made out with a guy at the club.”

 _Shit._ He did do that. He can hear the disapproving tone to Adam's voice as he continues. “I mean... it's none of my business but... it was kind of a bad move. There were a lot of people around and it was only because Tommy saw that guy lead you out that I came looking for you. He said you looked drunk and I didn't want you doing something you'd regret...”

“Thank you. I would have been pretty angry with myself if I'd let...”

“That's what I thought.”

Adam places the coffee by the side of the bed and Kris reaches out for Adam's hand. “You seem mad at me.”

“I'm not. I was just worried... and...”

 _“And?”_

“Again, it's none of my business but is this a new development in your life? Hooking up with random guys, I mean. It's just we're friends and I thought... you know you can tell me anything. I guess... I thought that you would tell me something like that...”

“It's not recent... I mean... I'm not saying I want to or have been hooking up with random guys. It's just... it's more complicated than that and I wanted to tell you. More than anyone I wanted to talk to you but I didn't really know where to start and I was worried.”

“Worried about what? How I'd react? You know me better than that, Kris.”

“No, I was worried because if I tell you what I want to tell you then things are going to change. No matter what your reaction is. This, what we have, it won't be the same after what I'm going to tell you but... maybe I don't have a choice now because last night happened and we're here and I don't know when I'll get the chance to do this again...”

Adam sits down on the bed and shuffles close to Kris. He has grabbed hold of Kris's hand now and Kris looks at the way their hands fit together. When he looks at Adam's face he doesn't see the same man he saw last night, there is no make-up, hair product or flashy outfits. It's just Adam. It makes this easier and harder in some ways too.

“Come on, Kris. You're kind of freaking me out here. I feel like you're about to break up with me.” Adam laughs and Kris can't laugh back at that because he'd have to actually be with Adam for that to be a possibility and he is sure if he ever got the chance to be with Adam he wouldn't ever want to let him go.

“I'm kind of... well lately... you know... this is awkward.” Adam's eyes are wide and he is worrying his bottom lip into his mouth and Kris's self control really deserves a round of applause for the last few months. Or at least a reward for lasting so long. So Kris kisses Adam.

It's kind of awkward at first. Kris can feel the moment Adam tenses and realises that Kris is kissing him and it's just Kris moving against him for a while. Then it shifts very suddenly and Adam comes alive, his lips and tongue working against Kris's mouth and it's all kinds of bliss. Kris likes Adam's hair like this, soft as his fingers work through it. He likes how Adam's hands press against the small of his back urging them closer. He wants to laugh and jump on the bed because Adam is kissing him back.

“Ungh...” Adam mumbles against Kris's lips and pulls back.

“No.” Kris lurches forward again but Adam has already moved away from the bed and has started pacing.

“You just kissed me.” Kris nods. “You totally just kissed me! Ha. Kris Allen, _you kissed me.”_

“I know. Can you not say my name like that though... it's weird.”

“But we just kissed! Don't you think that's weird?”

Kris thinks about that for like a second. “Ahh no. I think that was hot.”

“Really? You thought kissing me was hot?” Adam is acting like an excited bunny, hopping around the room and then settling down next to Kris again. “I mean... I thought it was hot too. I always imagined that it would be. Not that I imagined us kissing a lot... more in the early days you know? But... that was... I don't know.”

“Yeah.” Kris smiles and Adam is looking at him like he really wants to kiss him again and Kris can't really say he'd have a problem with that. Their faces are so close, there's an intensity that Kris can feel, telling him that this kiss is going to be even better and more than the last.

“Wait... what did you want to tell me?”

Generally Kris thinks Adam is a really smart guy, but sometimes he is just silly. “What do you think, Adam?”

“Oh. _Oh.”_

There's not much talking after that really. Adam asks Kris how long as he pulls off the sheet covering Kris and presses himself along his body. Kris tries to answer but he’s lost in the sensation of Adam's hands on his body. He wants to see Adam and the stupid jeans he has on look like they’ll need ten people to get him out of them. But he is determined if nothing else, so he is going to try. Adam laughs into Kris's neck when after five minutes of trying Adam is still not pant-less.

He stands up and Kris is not okay with that, even if it is necessary. Adam's fingers linger on his zipper then he stops and crosses his arms. “You first.” Adam smirks.

“I'm already half naked here.”

“Only _half._ I want to see you.” Adam's voice is soft and low. Kris would do anything Adam asked right now. He lifts up his hips and shuffles slightly, pulling his boxers down and throwing them in Adam's direction. Adam laughs and ducks out of the way. His eyes working their way up the entirety of Kris's body. No one has looked at him like that before, ever. Hunger and blatant want in their eyes.

“Can I ask you something?” Kris nods and Adam lifts up his shirt and throws it across the room. “Have you thought about me? When you're alone... like this? Adam motions to Kris on the bed and unzips his jeans, pulling them and his underwear down in one go.

“Of course I have.”

“Show me. Show me what you do when you think about me.”

“But... I...”

Adam walks slowly toward the bed again and Kris cannot take his eyes off Adam. He feels like he is some kind of dream. Adam towering over him alluring and asking things from Kris that he never even knew he wanted.

“I'll be right here... I just want to see.”

The bed dips and Adam straddles Kris's calves, looking down at Kris's body, Kris' cock now hard against his stomach. Adam leans forward and takes hold of Kris’s had to lick his palm, moving it down and wrapping it round Kris's cock. “I know you don't need my help to do this, Kris.” Adam leans down, his lips hovering over Kris's ear. _“Show me.”_

Kris's body comes to life and he works himself slowly like he has so many times before with the image of Adam on top him. It's so much more like reality now he can feel the heaviness of Adam on his legs. Now he can see every cure of Adam's body, the intensity in his eyes as he watches Kris's hand moving slowly over his cock.

 _“Adam.”_

“What? What do you need?”

“You. I just need you...”

“I'm here...”

Adam leans forward again, this time he rests his head against Kris's thigh, licking his lips as Kris runs his thumb over the head of his cock. Adam smiles and turns his head to press kisses against Kris's skin, licking his tongue up the skin of Kris's inner thigh, stopping any time he gets close to where Kris really wants him to be.

“I don't want to... not like this...” Kris's voice is ragged. “I want to _feel_ you. Come here.”

Kris drops his hand away and urges Adam to move up his body. When their lips meet this time it's so much different than before. Adam is slow and searching, he sets the pace perfectly and grinds himself up against Kris causing the perfect amount of friction. Kris has so many things he wants to ask, he wants to feel himself in Adam's mouth, he wants to feel Adam inside him... he wants it all but he can't think of anything passed this moment right now. It's enough... it's everything he needs to prove this is real and is happening.

Adam grips them both, his hand large and warm around them. He rubs his thumb over the head of his own cock and then Kris's and then matches the pace to their kissing. Kris can feel Adam's touch through his whole body, starting in his toes and leaving through his fingers. He wants them to get to the moment together, and he begs Adam to slow down so he can hold on, but Adam is still moving so slow already and it's torture to be able to hold himself back.

Adam whispers against Kris's lips. _“Come Kris...”_

Kris does. Adam's voice is commanding and desperate and Kris is unable to do anything but fall apart in Adam's arms. Adam is close behind him, his face blissed out and close to Kris's, pressing kisses against Kris's face as he jerks himself through it. Adam is heavy against him but Kris doesn't care, he can deal with the feeling of Adam surrounding him like this as long as he gets to keep him forever.

“I kind of have a crush on you... you know that?”

Adam laughs. “A crush, huh?”

Kris nods. “Mhmm. How do you feel about that?”

“Well I'm flattered of course.”

Kris sighs happily. His fingers tracing along Adam's back. “I told you things would change after I told you how I felt.”

“I'm kind of okay with that...” Adam rolls over and Kris is about to protest but he takes Kris with him. Hooking a leg around Kris and keeping them close together.

“Umff.” Kris mumbles into Adam's neck and continues to trace along Adam's skin. _Freckles._ “Hee.”

“What? Are you laughing at my freckles?”

“There's just so many of them...”

“Do I need to remind you...” Adam traces a finger along the top of Kris's back and he shivers. “... that a certain someone has them too.”

“Yeah but your ones are like... super freckles. Look at them!”

Adam looks unhappily down at his arm. “I hate them.”

Kris pinches him. “I won't accept any hating on these freckles. I'm very invested in them. I plan to spend a lot of time showing you just how much I love them.”

“I guess I'd be okay with that.”

Then Adam wriggles underneath him and he sets Kris on fire. He wants to be everywhere all at once, covering Adam's body and kissing him until neither of them can breathe. That's his plan anyway. He wants to stick to this one.


End file.
